EPISODE 68: CROTCH CARE SOLUTIONS WITH FRANCES TANG, FOUNDER OF AWKWARD ESSENTIALS
MEET: FRANCES TANG
Frances Tang is the founder, CEO, and Captain Awkward of Awkward Essentials, an innovative personal hygiene company best-known for its marquee product, the dripstick, that makes post-sex cleanup a piece of cake.
Frances grew up in the Bay Area and always assumed that she would someday go to college, get a job in a glass office building, and take the ‘normal’ route. She found a corporate job in marketing that paid the bills but left her feeling uninspired. Dissatisfied with the lack of convenient solutions for post-sex cleanup on the market, Frances was determined to create a product that would replace the sacrificial sex towel.
She committed herself to creating a safe, easy-to-use product that would absorb post-sex fluids. After dozens of iterations, the solution took the form of a small sponge with a handle. Insert the sponge in the vagina, swirl it around to absorb everything, and remove — the dripstick was born. Her mission now? To expand Awkward Essentials’ product portfolio to include more products that will upgrade your crotch care regimen.
Website:
Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/awkwardessentials
Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/awkwardessentials/
Twitter:
https://twitter.com/awkessentials
LinkedIn:
SHOW NOTES
It all started when Frances Tang was working as a baker, scooping cake batter with a spatula. Suddenly, the idea hit her: "What if there was a spatula for my vagina?"
Fast forward to today, and Frances Tang now runs norm-redefining sexual wellness company Awkward Essentials. Her company creates innovative crotch care solutions for the awkward things we do when we close the bathroom door. Her mission with Awkward Essentials? To remove the stigma surrounding "hella personal problems." Frances has also become the sole venture capital-backed female Asian American entrepreneur in the sexual wellness and sex tech space.
Though after-sex care is a very giggle-worthy topic, the struggles Frances faced to get to this point were very real. Tune in to listen to her journey (including what her parents had to think of their daughter creating a cum sponge), what it's like navigating being the only solo VC-backed female Asian American entrepreneur in the sex tech space, how she uses humor to normalize conversations about sexual health, and her tips to develop confidence.
We also explore:
FULL TRANSCRIPT
Judy Tsuei 00:00
Hello, hello,
Judy Tsuei 00:01
thank you for joining me this week, it's gonna be a really interesting conversation because I'm interviewing Francis Tang, who's the founder CEO. And as she calls it, Captain awkward of awkward essentials, which is an innovative personal hygiene company that's best known for its marquee product, that drip stick, that makes post sex cleanup a piece of cake. Before we get into that, and before I tell you a little bit more about Francis, I wanted to share where we are evolving with this podcast.
Judy Tsuei 00:26
We've shown up at the same random places in LA this huge city, not knowing that the other person was going to be there. At the same time, we bought the same kind of clothing from random, you know, stores, my mom and her sister who live one lives in Taiwan, one lives in the US. They have the same haircut, they look exactly alike from the back couldn't tell you which one was which, you know, it's just very interesting how we're tied in that way.
Judy Tsuei 00:26
So, oftentimes, I've had a thought and then, you know, one of my siblings will call me at the time or my mom, you will not believe and people say this about parenting that like the parent always know, the mom always knows. But there have been so many times recently where I've thought about something that I wanted to get for my daughter. And then the next time we go visit grandma and grandpa Poupon Gong Gong, they bought that exact thing for I've never said anything about it. And it's just been this amazing serendipity.
Judy Tsuei 00:26
So after I had this realization, A couple days later, my mom calls me and she's like, you name your daughter something that I can't say I'm like, I literally just thought about that the other day. And so I asked her, How would you pronounce it and she was like, Robert Ryder. So my parents have worked very hard to be able to pronounce her name as it is. But all of that is to say is that there's just been so much learning and growing, and a desire to be seen, so that I can be of service to others, when I pitched out my book, and I've mentioned to you before that season two would be this kind of documentation of this journey to get this book published.
Judy Tsuei 00:26
And I firmly believe in the energetics behind things, I believe in the laws of the universe, in how we have the power to manifest and we have the power to create obstacles, whether we're aware of them or not. So for me, I can feel right now, energetically, that I have a little bit of a block. Even though I've spent six months creating this proposal work with a book coach, I had a couple of agents reach back out to me and give me some feedback. But I can just feel that there's something preventing me from moving forward with it. And not because I don't believe in the purpose.
Judy Tsuei 00:26
In fact, when I got the feedback from two of the agents that basically said that memoir is a really hard, niche industry to sell in, because you need to have a huge platform. You know, it was disappointing, because if you think about all of these influencers, and who it is that you follow, what is it that they look like? What are their lives look like? And you know, are those followers and is that engagement real? When I was working as an editor of a live conscious music and events website, I got an opportunity to interview the luminaries in the spiritual field.
Judy Tsuei 00:26
So you know, I met Don Miguel Ruiz, I spoke with people who work with Deepak Chopra, it was all of us. But I also got to see the back end of it behind the curtain, and I got to see how human a lot of these people were, I think, whatever spiritual path you're on, we are here as human beings incarnated on this planet, to experience human things. And I actually recently did a meditation a couple of months ago, where the man had been studying this Buddhist Zen meditation.
Judy Tsuei 00:26
And he had shared that all of the people that he's not who've truly kind of touched that sense of enlightenment, what they've come back to realize is that this human experience, is what we are meant to have, and that it's being fully present and aware, and embracing and experiencing, that is why we're here. And so he said that the more enlightened that you become, it's not like you're trying to live in another stratosphere, you're actually realizing like, this is the practice, this is the journey. And so there's a sense of peace and a sense of just wonder, and curiosity about this human experience, it was such a lovely way to just be reminded that being human is okay.
Judy Tsuei 00:26
and just people who have very interesting stories and insights to share that may help to guide your path or expand your horizons or whatever it is that you would like to take away from it. As I always say, Take what you like, leave the rest. And then because the holidays are coming around, and I know for me, it can sometimes be a somewhat stressful and tense time, because I'm a divorced parent. We also navigate, you know, holiday schedules and all that.
Judy Tsuei 00:26
So I want to offer a few mindfulness practices towards the end of December. So you have a few things to kind of keep you healthy mentally and emotionally throughout the rest of the year into 2022. So Francis Tang, she grew up in the Bay Area. And she always assumed that she would someday go to college, get a job in a glass office building take the normal route, which she did, she found a job in corporate marketing and pay the bills, but she didn't feel very inspired. So as she continued to live her life, she realized that she was increasingly dissatisfied with the lack of convenient solutions for post sex cleanup. So she was determined to create a product that will replace that sacrificial sex towel that many of us know too well.
Judy Tsuei 00:26
So she created a safe, easy to use product that absorbs fluids post sex, and she went through a lot of iterations. And you can see more of this on her website. There's an amazing video with a Twinkie where something's being inserted into it. But here is where the drip stick was born. And she's now expanding awkward essentials, their product portfolio to include more products that you never know you needed to upgrade your crush care regimen. We had an incredible conversation. It was very enjoyable and amusing. And I love this whole idea of she her voice really comes through in her company and through the products. And the whole point of awkward essentials isn't personal hygiene. It's the products that nobody wants to talk about that you
Judy Tsuei 00:26
And it's all good, exciting news. And I hope that you will continue to share your thoughts by emailing me at hello at F*ck saving face calm,or joining us in our private Facebook group, where we're starting to have more incredible conversations around all the topics that we're exploring here. And you can also follow me on Instagram, f*ck saving face, all of that is without the U. However, I wanted to say that in season one, I was producing three episodes a week. And it was structured in such a way that Monday's was the personal essay. Wednesdays was an expert interview that elaborated on that theme that I brought up on Monday. And Fridays was a mindfulness practice that really tied it all together and gave you an opportunity to just breathe and come home to yourself.
Judy Tsuei 01:06
I know how busy all of us are, and just how simple intentional practice can be. And just giving you a few moments of reprieve or centering or grounding. In season two, I then spaced it out a little bit more. Because if you've been following me for a while, you know that I'm also a single divorced parent, and an entrepreneur and writing a book coming out in 2020 with Simon and Schuster, and then pitching a memoir, there's just a lot of things. So I spaced it out a little bit more with the same structure that one week it was the personal essay, one week, it was the interview with expert and then one week it was a mindfulness practice.
Judy Tsuei 01:39
And when I put out the call to find out which types of episodes you liked the best it was kind of, you know, spread across the board that it was an equal preference. So I wanted to keep doing that and continue to have that personal field. So you could hear just what's going on with one person's life who's trying to navigate all of these different things as a multi passionate entrepreneur, and a single parent and you know, healing past traumas while stepping into the version of myself that I wanted to be. I was just shared this episode of a podcast about Rachel Hollis, which I hadn't been following. I tried to listen to her book, girl wash her face.
Judy Tsuei 02:18
And it wasn't something that really resonated with me. But apparently, there has been some hullabaloo about the comments that she's made. And you know, just what kind of influence you have as an influencer and how being a leader you need to be mindful of that or being someone who people look up to. And if you've listened to Season Two thus far, then you know that I've kind of struggled with this idea growing up in my traditional Asian household that you weren't supposed to be seen. And if you were going to be seen you better be seen in a very docile, submissive kind of way where you're respecting your elders, and doing what was told, you know, to you, that was the right appropriate behavior.
Judy Tsuei 02:57
Well, I was also raised in the West, I was raised in California. So by nature, I tend to be rebellious, I tend to have a very, I don't know about loud love, people tell me that they like my love. So, you know, I was just more different than the cultural expectations of my family of origin. So I would often struggle with that. And then I named my daughter, Wilder. So on top of everything when I gave her that name, and I asked my mother to come up with a Chinese name for her.
Judy Tsuei 03:26
She said to me, you know, you gave your daughter a name that that word in Mandarin isn't necessarily one that has the most positive connotations. So it was interesting. Also, hilariously that I named my daughter, Wilder, that's a, W, and L, are all of these letters that are very challenging for someone with in Chinese accent or Mandarin accent to be able to say. So a couple of weeks after my daughter was born, I realized, oh my gosh, I named her something that my parents can't say. And then because my family as challenging as it was growing up, we are intuitively connected through and through, there is no doubt about that.
Judy Tsuei 04:07
Because I think, you know, if you've been in the spiritual world, as a yoga teacher, as a holistic practitioner, the term spiritual bypassing comes up a lot, where you use the spiritual practices to get out of the discomfort of what it is that you're experiencing. So being human is where we are, where we're meant to be. So, you know, when the agents came back and gave me that feedback, I had this perfectly timed conversation with my partner, who is a school administrator. And so he just happened to have worked in predominantly Asian American communities.
Judy Tsuei 08:28
And, you know, the whole reason that this book idea came about was because we were having a conversation, were sharing elements of my life growing up, he is a white man who grew up on the East Coast. And so his family dynamic was very different than mine. And while I was talking to him, he was saying, I really wish that my students could access your stories and your learnings and what you've come through, because what you're sharing with me now is what students come to my office and talk to me about and it just kind of blew my mind where I was like, Wait, what are you talking about? I thought that, for some reason, after I grew up, that that generation of Tiger parenting or whatever it was that I experienced, will kind of go away. And I had a very clear awakening that that was not the case.
Judy Tsuei 09:11
So during the time of COVID, as well, you know, mental and emotional health was very challenging for a lot of these students who, who's, you know, at this age, what I've learned about child development and brain development, your brain isn't fully developed into adulthood until your early 20s. So you're still very impressionable. And if you think back to when you were in junior high, and what that felt like for you, and how heavy things could be, and he was telling me about a couple of students who committed suicide. And it was very sad to me because I had a conversation about it with a friend who said, well, that's just very unfortunate because they haven't made it enough times around the sun to realize that things will turn out okay, that you'll get through the hard times that even though there could be devastating things that happen, that your resiliency of the human spirit will continue to go on.
Judy Tsuei 09:58
And so it may Do you realize how often I thought about suicide when I was young when I was in junior high? You know, when I was in high school, my family was so unhealthy at the time that I truly had said to myself, if I don't get into a college that enables me to move away from home, I will kill myself. And that wasn't this grandiose statement. It was that depth of despair that I was feeling and that sense of hopelessness. So the whole reason that I created the memoir was to give these younger individuals, my goal was, you know, junior high, high school, early college, hope, just someone story that made it through, it was like when I was in eating disorder therapy in my mid 20s.
Judy Tsuei 10:39
And I never saw anybody come back and say, My life is amazing, I've done so well. And I think that it would have been nice to see that someone could make it through the other side. And so that is why I wrote the book. So after I got these, quote, unquote, rejections from these agents, they're very thoughtfully crafted, they took the time to talk to me to tell me what could be improved, or what the industry was about, I had this conversation with a partner, and he said, It's suicide prevention week at school. So it always tends to be a heavy time, you know, things get brought up, there are cases of self harm that come to the surface. And it reminded me once again, why I wanted to write this book.
Judy Tsuei 11:17
So whatever happens with it, however it unfolds, whether it's picked up by a publishing house, it becomes an NFT. With all of my studying about crypto, or, you know, I'm self published, however, it comes to fruition, I believe that it needs to come to fruition as a means of tellings, the story where people have always said to me, you give me the words that I need to express the things that I didn't know how to say that I feel. And so I'm hoping that's what the book does. And so if you want to join me on that journey, you know, you're more than welcome to follow on social media or join our Facebook group, as I had mentioned, and just, you know, I'm a human being too.
Judy Tsuei 11:55
So I could use the encouragement that this is an idea that needs to get out there in the world. With all that said, because my strategic content marketing agency, wild, harder words is growing exponentially. I've taken on three new junior copywriters in a very short amount of time. And I'm hiring a project manager. And there's more clients coming through, I also became a mentor with a founder Institute. And we're in the San Diego chapter. And I'll tell you a funny little story where all the mentors get reviewed by the mentees just like we review the mentees.
Judy Tsuei 12:29
And so they're all in this incubator and accelerator to grow their business ideas, and they're at different stages of their ideas. So I went to a mentor, thank you dinner, and I got to meet these incredible people, all different backgrounds, all different business ideas, all different levels of, you know, success and achievement. And so my friend who brought me on into this organization, I asked him, if he could provide some of the feedback, I'd like to see it. I'd like to potentially use it as testimonials on my website. And so he was looking into how to get that feedback for me. And he's like, Well, I don't know how to get it quite yet. But I'll look into it for you.
Judy Tsuei 13:00
But I can tell you that you were rated a nine. And I was like, is that out of 10? Because the Asian in me is saying why is that not an A plus? So then he proceeded to tell me that there were only three mentors who had ratings somewhat higher than mine out of 104. And, you know, we were joking about it. And he said, Well, I'm disappointed in you, if that makes you feel any better. So it was a great reminder of, you know, really looking at how we define what is most meaningful to us, and how we can give ourselves that compassion and that grace.
Judy Tsuei 13:37
But it was also it has been super exciting to see that I've taken these 20 years of experience and being able to help pivot people's stories, their marketing. When I met with a co director of founder Institute, he said, I want to let you know that I had a lot of one on one calls with the different founders today. And a lot of them spoke with you and had their one on one sessions with you. And they came back and just told me you know, the highest praise and compliments and how your input and feedback helped them be able to express what it was they're doing clearly potentially even help them pivot a little bit more in terms of their messaging and how to mark it. And it was just, I don't think we hear that enough.
Judy Tsuei 14:17
Just you know, the positive impact that you can make on someone else's life by being you by bringing your light and your expertise in the world. So if you need support, feel free to reach out to me and my team. You can find us at Wild hearted words calm. Alright, so all of that is to say that because we are so busy because all of these amazing clients are coming in then I am going to use November and December as guest highlight opportunities I've interviewed so many phenomenal people that I want to be able to just highlight them I'll still do intro outros, but over the next few weeks, maybe through the end of December, it will be all of these individual interviews that you'll get to hear from thought leaders and politicians and venture capitalists
Judy Tsuei 17:10
need for certain situations in your life, you know, the awkward ones. So without further ado, let's jump into the conversation
Judy Tsuei 17:25
WELCOME TO THE F*CK saving face podcast. I'm your host Judy Tsuei and together we'll explore mental and emotional health for Asian Americans and beyond all by breaking through taboo topics, like may not always be pretty, but it is indeed beautiful. Let's make your story beautiful today. Welcome back to the flex saving face podcast. I am so excited today because I have Francis Tang, who is a founder and created this company called awkward essentials. And when you hear about it, I'm just going to read a few of the testimonials to like lean into it before I turn it over to describe exactly what this product is and how we got here.
Judy Tsuei 18:05
But it's been featured in Bice well, and good Cosmo shaundalyn all these other things. So I'm just gonna read a few testimonials to kind of tease what awkward Essentials is all about. So one of the first testimonials is this is my second order. I love these things. No one likes to talk about the cleanup after sex. But my husband and I have always been so open about it. And he knows I cannot just roll over and go to sleep after sex. And then the next day trickle out. These make cleanup a breeze and the following day nice and dry. Thanks for a clever and seriously amazing product. And someone else said what a time to be alive.
Judy Tsuei 18:39
When I first saw the products advertisement, I thought to myself that whoever invented this is a genius. I am only angry that I did not think of this idea of myself. This product has revolutionized my life, no awkward walking across my house, trying to find a dirty towel to wipe off on, I can rest assured that one to two hours later, a huge wad of semen isn't going to just randomly fall out. These are the best things ever. So I love this. Because, you know, in the idea of fuck saving face, there's so many things that people don't talk about. And I think in the journey of I mean, especially if you're a woman, and then through the different phases of your life. So let's say you have a child. And you know, I've heard about this with menopause just like How come nobody talks about these things. Especially given like, you know, you have friends who've probably gone through something similar. So I'm going to turn it over to Francis to talk about what exactly awkward Essentials is.
19:33
Hey, Judy, so excited to be here. Thank you for having me. So awkward Essentials is a company that creates innovative crotch care solutions. And really the goal is to talk about all the things that we do in the bathroom like when we close the bathroom door. So so many things right? Like I can't tell you how many times I've taken tweezers to my crock that's just trying to like dig out an ingrown hair, just something and so our first product is an invention that came out of my brain called drip. Stick and it's an after sex cleanup sponge.
20:02
So I just personally did not like the after sex cleanup similar to that review where that girl did not like that water have come coming out of her vagina three hours later, that was me. And every single time I would have sex, it was just, it just didn't, it wasn't something that I was looking forward to because of the cleanup. Because for my body, it's like stayed in there and adrift on the sheets, and I got my underwear dirty, and then like you're walking around the next day, and you have no idea if it's your period, or if it's come from the previous evening. And so I created this product.
20:34
Because I couldn't find a solution. I looked online, and everyone was talking about like wipes and towels and old T shirts, which is totally fine for the outside. But like the issue is inside, its internal. I'm a very like efficiency driven person. And so I'm like to solve this problem, we just have to remove it from the inside. So drip stick is a medical grade sponge that absorbs all the excess fluids internally. And because it's a sponge, it can absorb something that's like thicker and more quickly than blood. Hmm,
Judy Tsuei 21:04
I and so if anybody you know hasn't been to the awkward essentials website, I highly encourage you to do it, because they use a Twinkie and some whipped cream. And then you can see how this bunch actually works, which is fascinating. But you know, I think one of the really interesting things here is that, before we got on this conversation, you know, we've gotten on actually two other conversations where the time just flew by, we actually didn't record the interview, because we were just talking about this personal stuff before. But one of the questions that Francis gets asked a lot is, you know, like, what did your dad think about this? And so I thought that that was such an interesting exploration. You know, first I'd love to ask how you identify when it comes to Asian culture? And then can you tell us a little bit more about that story? And that question that you get asked a lot.
21:48
Yeah, so I'm a Chinese person, I look like a Chinese person. That's how I grew up. My parents are Chinese. My dad is from Hong Kong. My mom was born here. And so people often ask me, like, what does your dad think about your company, and I don't know if they're coming from a place of like, sexism, because I'm a female on my company is sex related, or potentially, like racism, because I'm Asian and Asian people are known to like, not talk about this kind of stuff at all.
22:16
But I'm very fortunate in that my dad is actually also a founder, non this space, he's in the tech space. But for him, he just sees this as like another opportunity, like, Okay, you found a problem, you found a solution. Now go solve that problem with your solution. And that's strictly how he sees it. So he's been incredibly supportive. I was actually shipping and fulfilling out of my parents house, like every startup founder, in the very beginning. And they were helping me pack the boxes. And I turned one of the rooms into like a storage room. So I'm very, very lucky that they were supportive of what I was doing, despite the despite what it is.
Judy Tsuei 22:53
And I think what's interesting is you also shared that you have a brother, and that he, so you grew up in San Francisco, and that the way that your parents parented was different than a lot of the other Asian Americans who you grew up with. So you saw the tiger parenting firsthand, even though that that's not what you experienced. And yet, you know, for your brother who has a different personality type, that he moved to Japan, because like that is the that really worked for his personality. So I'd love for you to talk about that. And then you know, the stuff that you shared, that's not official, but that you being the solo like Asian female founder, that you might be the only person in this space, the first ever so can you talk about that as well?
23:32
Yeah, so I grew up in the Bay Area, I went to a super cutthroat High School, it was a lot of Asian kids and all my friends were in like, insane amount of like AP classes and playing piano and going to Chinese school and all those normal Tiger Mom fans. They have their kids do. But my parents are kind of unusual. I feel like they were kind of like hippies, like they very much said like, Okay, we want you to do something you enjoy. So the only requirement they ever really had for us was to do a team sport, because they wanted and myself and my brother to like, learn the value of working with others and working in a team but in terms of pressuring us to take like AP classes or go to a certain college, it just wasn't there.
24:15
And so, for me, I think it manifested into me being comfortable trying a lot of things. I mean, I've always been very hobby driven. And so even in high school, I was like Tahitian dancing and volunteer and just like discovering different things, and I was like comfortable with it because there weren't really any guardrails from my parents, and that carried over into college and into my adult life, which actually was the inspiration for this product. Baking was inspiration for drumstick. And so it's completely different for my brother though, because he grew up in that environment and he decided he wanted structure. He wanted roles. He wanted to know what to do and where his places and so he ended up moving to Japan were very different.
24:56
I guess most of them are super different, but that's kind of how it manifested. So pretty interesting. I guess it's worth noting also that my mom, my grandmother, and my mom's side, she grew up in Mexico, there's like a lot of Chinese people in Mexico. And so there's a lot of really random, like Mexican influences when I was growing up that I didn't realize was there until I got older. Like, I had no idea that eating like a bowl of refried beans and cheese as a snack was like, usual for an Asian person, especially in the Bay Area. But that's what I was doing. And so it was it was kind of nice, like a lot of our family parties had like mariachi bands and stuff.
25:34
Oh, my gosh, that's so amazing. Yeah, but they're like in Chinese restaurants. So it's, like cross culturally, potentially confusing, but just it was, it was really great. And I'm grateful for that freedom, when I was younger, to just to kind of like, help me manifest this creative, really crazy brand that just came out of my brain because I've been doing weird things my entire life. And then in terms of that stat, it looks like as of right, so we're VC back to which has been an insane journey. In itself. There's very few female founders that are VC backed, which is an unfortunate statistic in itself. But in terms of in the FEM tech, sex tech space, there's not a lot of other, like founders of color, especially Asian founders. And so as far as we know, right now, I'm the only solo Asian female founder in fantech, sex tech that has raised VC funding, which is very bittersweet, but hoping we can all change that.
Judy Tsuei 26:32
That's amazing. Can you tell me a bit more about like, what that journey has been like, because one of the women who I interviewed she's the first non API voice that's going to appear on the podcast, or depending on whenever this episode launches. So she wrote a book called Leap Frog, for female entrepreneurs. And so you know, I think people magazine voted her like one of the rising Latinx figures. And so she's been in that VC space for a long time. So she talks a lot in our interview about how to have people of color breakthrough, I've actually interviewed a lot of like VC people this season, I think. And so just talking about the disparity in the numbers, and you know, culturally in mindset, and how that all plays into it. But you know, what has been your experience in this entrepreneurial journey?
27:13
It's been hard, I think, if you don't grow up with it, or you didn't go to like an Ivy League college, where you're surrounded by other people who know about it, or have connections, or you can easily raise an angel round and have friends and family around fun, you don't know where to start, because there's not really any hard and fast rules about how to do it. And so for me, I think, especially as a female founder, I needed a lot of confirmation and confidence building along the way, like I had this idea, but I didn't just have this idea and say, I'm going to execute it, this is going to be the best company ever.
27:46
Like that confidence was not there. And I don't, I don't know that I even now today have that full 100% certainty that you hear and a lot of like male founders. And so for me, I really needed these, like I needed to have the small series of events happen to build my confidence. So whether it's like friends who are supportive, and not telling me why it wouldn't work, but telling me why it would work, because I think it's very common for people to want to protect you, especially if you want to take a chance. And so having a supportive network that can help like uplift you and, you know, tell you where those red flags are, but still help you. And then I was lucky enough to get into an incredible accelerator program called Grid 110.
28:32
They're actually having their applications are open for their nationwide program right now. So they have it was based in downtown LA, but they now have a nationwide program. And it was just another one of those pushes that I need to be like, Oh, look, someone else believes in this idea. Or someone else thinks that this can go somewhere. And so being in that program, surrounded by other people who had ideas that they were trying to get to prototype was just another incredible, I guess, stepping stone to help me gain that confidence, because a lot of it is just figuring it out, right?
29:05
You know how to building a business is like building a plane as it's crashing, or land or whatever that quote is, it's kind of like that, like a lot of googling a lot of trial and error and a lot of figuring it out, especially if you don't know anyone else who's done it. So I think something that can be helpful is finding those tribes, there are a lot of communities for founders and founders of color and female founders and other people in there that want to help and want to mentor and you know, want to help you figure out this next step. So you don't have to do it on your own. It's finding those resources, and then also just doing it so you can change the entire system yourself.
Judy Tsuei 29:45
Hmm, that's amazing. So what's been this? Well, first of all, how big is your company now? And you know, what's been the experience now that you've gotten funding and you're like growing as a company? What's that been like?
29:56
So we're fairly small, but we have doubled our headcount. Recently, and I mean, I, I never thought I would have a company or this VC like tech or like talking about it the way in which I am now, it's crazy how accelerated the learning is, once you just like dive in, you just have to figure it out. And so I think there's pros and cons to VC funding. Of course, it's everything that you're going to see when you look it up online. But one of the big pros is that you can take chances, you can take those risks, because I've had smaller lifestyle businesses, and when you're pouring your savings into it, and everything you have, sometimes you just cannot afford to take those bigger risks that could potentially help you grow by leaps and bounds, but it's a risk.
30:44
And if it doesn't work, then there go your savings. And so I think that that's kind of one of the biggest upsides and just like the learning experience, because I mean, that business survival rate is pretty low. And we know that, factually, we know that. So I've kind of always told myself, okay, whether or not we make it out alive, I want to make it out alive. But whether or not we make it out alive, like the experience in itself is just been better than any MBA program I could have ever gone to or paid for.
Judy Tsuei 31:16
Hmm, that's amazing. I think that as you're speaking, it's reminding me I have a call later today with a potential agent. And so you know, I put together the book proposal, it took way longer than I thought it was going to. It's like a 60 page sales letter, essentially. And so, you know, I did all that. And the friends in my life are like, regardless of what happens, and even if they say yes, or if they say no, that's just one step of many that are going to come. But like you've done the thing, you've created the proposal, you took a step in that direction.
32:13
I think is seeing my, like, this product that I had in my head that doesn't exist in the world in the wild and seeing the responses that people have is so rewarding, right? Because I'd like I think probably my the fate my favorite DMS and emails we get are from women who are like, I thought there was something wrong with me, you know, I I never talked to anyone about this, I thought it was something that was wrong with me.
32:41
Or like now I'm actually having more often and enjoyable sex with my husband, because it was just something that I worried about, because something that I do think about a lot is the mental load that women have, right, we're always thinking about, like what needs to be done next. And we have a million checklist. And there's just there's always so many things running through our mind. And so just be able to, like ease that mental burden of not having to worry about one more thing.
33:06
I don't know, it's super, it's just, it's, that's probably the best feeling. And the best part because jumping into this, I really had no idea of anyone would one understand the idea to buy it. And like three like actually like it and have it be useful and helpful to their life. Because every body and every vagina and every like sex escapade is different. But it has been and so just the community, this is a really strong community we built to has been really, really nice.
33:35
Like, I feel like a lot, so many of our customers are willing to go to bat for us. Because social media is ruthless, right? Like people will say whatever they want to call our comments section, our dumpster fire, like if you are starting a if someone is mean to you, and you want to better just look at our comments, saying, but so many of our customers are in there saying hey, I use this and it helps or I use this and, you know, improves my life. And so it's I think that's probably the best part. I love
Judy Tsuei 34:06
hearing that. Because I think that what you're saying underscores why this podcast even exists to help remove that guilt and shame to help start having like normalized conversations around things that we all experienced, but we feel very lonely about because we don't open up about it. So then we don't share about it. So then nobody else knows that we are going through this too. So I think that what you're talking about that mental load is really remarkable.
Judy Tsuei 34:28
How do you handle you know, given this, I think that what you were referring to earlier about going after something that maybe requires risk or something that other people haven't done before in their effort to protect you, you know, might kind of like squelch the dream a little bit or whatever it is, but how have you been able to handle like those comments or, you know, the doubts and the criticisms and, and all of
34:48
that. It's really hard. I mean, some days ahead, I feel like being a founder is the most emotionally tumultuous job you could choose in life. Although rewarding, so in the very beginning, it was like me versus the comment section versus everybody. And I think it's just remembering that all press is good press. Like if people aren't saying nice things, if they're not saying mean things, as people are saying really kind things, and there's gonna be someone probably saying really mean things at the same time, which means that you struck a chord with them, because my background is marketing. So if people said nothing, if they're like, Okay, that's fine.
35:32
That's probably the worst place that we could be in. And so I think the kindness that we see definitely offsets the mean comments, and just like doing our research, sometimes I'll DM them directly. Like if it's someone who seems like there's not just mean intent, and there's something else they're like, Hey, I'd love to understand more. Like, tell me what you think, like, is there a reason why, like, can you help me understand and oftentimes there's like nothing there. People on the internet are just like, comment, just like keyboard warriors. They're just like, they're and I don't know what I'm like, You know what, I'm actually really flattered that you took time out of your day to send us this mean, DM, we have a like a haterade corkboard in our office, which is all like the main DMS and comments that we get you there for a while. Yeah.
Judy Tsuei 36:17
That's incredible. I think that that's great to think that you could reframe, I feel like a lot of you know, what we've learned from a lot of the people that we talked to last season too, is like, you always have a choice. And you have the opportunity to reframe something, and then to take it and work with it however you want to to grow or to let it go, or whatever it is. And so there's nothing like finite and set in stone, which is remarkable.
Judy Tsuei 36:41
Has there been anything along the lines of You know, this idea of? Well, now, in season two, we're kind of looking to do more than just represent AAPI voices, but to start having conversations that kind of bridge cultural gaps or bridge, whatever divides so that we can actually start to have more transparent and supportive conversations to kind of illuminate you know, different mindsets.
Judy Tsuei 37:03
I know that scientifically, it's been shown that when you share your story with someone, that the person on the receiving end and listening to it, their brain starts to adapt to start visualizing, like what it's like for the person telling the story. And so that's where like empathy and compassion can kind of come. So I'm wondering if in your journey, you know, as an Asian American and as an Asian American female founder, if there's anything that's come up that you've been reflecting upon, or that you know, you would like more of a conversation around? It's a big question.
37:33
It is a good question. I think that humor is a lost component in some of these, these topics. Because personally, like, I lean into humor, I think it's kind of this great unifier, this great connector, especially when we're talking about things that we're uncomfortable with, right? A lot of people when they're uncomfortable, they tend to like make a joke or something like that. And so similar to what you're saying, I do Lean into my personal story a lot, because I don't want anyone to feel like I'm accusing them of being part of our target market.
38:07
And maybe when they're not, and if they're uncomfortable, it totally makes sense. So really just being forward about my personal story, I feel like startups currently, like years ago, they were very, like founders story focus, and they shifted away from that. And I think it's swinging back. And coming back to that, and I think it's really valuable. And then I think having that humor element is just something else that we've really embraced.
38:30
And that's worked really well for us to just like, approach the topic kind of like crack the door open just a little bit. And then from there, we can have those serious conversations or it will lead into something else, it doesn't mean that everything hygiene related has to be funnier, is humorous or isn't serious. But even just a small step in that direction, if you can kind of start that conversation, I think it's super valuable.
Judy Tsuei 38:54
because of your background and marketing. I mean, it's it's very apparent on your site, that the tone of voice and all of that is that kind of more like light hearted, welcoming, you know, tongue in cheek a little bit like it's, it's great. It feels really approachable, which is so lovely. So speaking of your personal story, I wanted to hear more about that, like, what is it that you usually share with people when you talk about your personal story?
39:20
I've had a lot of jobs. That's kind of the first thing that I start with. I've done it I've also I graduated during like the other recession. And I remember it was so incredibly hard to find a full time job I just cut off on a job to save my life. And it was I was very sad. It was it was a very dark time, right like no one wants to hire you because you don't have experience you don't have experience because no one wants to hire you like I couldn't even work for free at an internship like it was it was really rough. And so it kind of manifested into just doing all these little things and then discovering that I was a multi potential like I love diving into things and learning and getting to a certain level of mastery and then like apply those skills elsewhere.
40:02
And so that background was so many very jobs and varied small companies I tried to start that really gave me a good foundation and basis for what I'm doing now. So, for example, because I had a wedding photography, business, just learning, well, photography has been helpful, and then learning customer service and how to build a website and CRM, and just all those baseline things. And then I was also a baker for a little bit. So baking is what inspired the product like I mentioned earlier, so every time I would like scrape cake batter out of a bowl with a rubber spatula, a my cake batters very thick.
40:38
And so in my brain, I would say like, oh, it would be great. If I had a special for my vagina, I could just get everything out and like one fell swoop. So that was where the inspiration for this product came from. And so because my background has been so all over the place, I'm just a huge proponent of like trying things and doing things you're passionate about. Because I do believe that a lot of those connections and skills that you learn can translate into your current career or future career and make your point of view just that much more valuable. Hmm, I love
Judy Tsuei 41:09
it. You had this term that I'm curious if you could tell us more about like the current products and anything else that you're developing, but crotch care, I just love so much. Was it a term you came up with?
41:22
It before? Kind of like the that's kind of the base that we're trying to build? Because I think a lot of people assume that we're a sexual wellness company. And although our product is sex related, it's not like fun. It's not pleasurable, like, it's not very cool. It's very utilitarian. Right, I just, we just wanted to solve this problem. And so my goal is to continue solving awkward problems. But remaining in that crotch area, because it's a weird area, we'll talk about right there's like so many weird things that happened down there, that like you're so embarrassed to talk about, and you just you don't and you just go on the bathroom, you deal with it by yourself. And so I do not see us ever doing like condoms or lube or anything like that, like I see us doing other weird things, whether it's related to like hair, or sweat or pee, or just the weird stuff that happens down there. No things that happened down there.
Judy Tsuei 42:17
But that are awkward, essentially, yes, the name of your brand. I cannot tell you how much I love that. I love it. So one of my friends, she I always feel like I'm the one who's like super vulnerable and transparent and open in groups. But she takes it to the next level and adds that humor to it. So I love her so much, because it's just like someone speaking my love language, but like amplifying it in ways that you know, I want to tap into like the humor component. So I love that you're sharing that. So I asked all the guests at the end of the interview along the lines of facts saving face and you know, shifting either perspective, eliminating a topic that you'd really like people to consider or just to encourage people to just say, Fuck it about what would you encourage listeners to think about or reflect upon,
43:02
I would encourage listeners to find their tribe, because it's possible that your family or your immediate tribe might not be supportive or interested in what you're doing. And I think it's very common in the Asian community to you know, and it makes sense, right? Like you want your kids to do something that's stable and completely, completely make sense. But if there's something that you're passionate about, you can find that support, and it just might not be in your immediate community. So you have to do the work to find those people, but they're there and they want to help. And there's all kinds of communities and thanks to like the internet, you can find them.
Judy Tsuei 43:40
I love that I love it so much. Yeah, I feel like community is one of those things that you know, along the lines of being Asian and always seeing like the hard output. So like your status or your money or whatever, there's so many soft skills that aren't celebrated. And I think community building and being able to find those connections in those relationships can serve you so well from a mental component and emotional component. Like even like if you were to network, for example, and build your business or whatever it is, I just had one of my junior copywriters asked like, can you tell me how it is that you find clients because it feels like you're just having clients come to you all the time. And I just told her, like, at the end of the day, it's about how long you're in the game, but also about what kind of relationship you're building.
Judy Tsuei 44:24
So along the lines of like that customer service, or just, you know, I've never shared this a lot that like even in the most professional settings, I've always shown up exactly as I am. Yeah, very vulnerably authentically, yeah. And I can say like, it's always served me well, you know, like, obviously, I know like clear healthy boundaries and whatnot. But, but at the same time, like we are all humans at the end of the day, so we're just seeking like that, you know, connection and so it's so helpful. So thank you so much for sharing. If you'll want to follow up with you and order one of your products. Where can they find you? Yeah,
45:01
so our website is awkward, essential, calm, and all of our social handles are awkward essentials, Instagram, Facebook everywhere. You can email us that hey at awkward essentials calm or feel free to reach out to me directly on like LinkedIn, any platform, happy to chat if you're interested in getting in this industry field I had very few people I could talk to when I was starting this journey. And I remember there was one person I didn't even know him though I don't even think we ever met in person. But he was just so kind and so willing to like, answer my questions and respond. And so if I can be that person to someone else who's just starting, like, I would love to help, because it's tough, but it's very rewarding.
Judy Tsuei 45:41
Oh, thank you so much. That's such a generous like offer. And I think that that paying it forward is really remarkable. It's such a, it's a gratifying feeling for anybody who is nervous about reaching out to somebody, I would love to remind you that it feels as rewarding on the other end of it as like you asking, you know, and getting the information that you need. I think people want to help and people want to be there to support you. So especially in pursuit of your dreams.
Judy Tsuei 46:05
So thank you so much for your time today. And I've loved this conversation. Thank you, Judy. If you enjoy this episode, or you learn something new, especially in this area of crush care essentials, screenshot this episode and share it on all of your social. It's your sharing and your encouragement of this podcast that gets us out there in the world, so that someone who needs to hear this message today can hear it. As always, thank you so much for listening and supporting. And I will see you next week.
Judy Tsuei 46:38
Thank you so much for listening to today's episode. You can follow me on Instagram at F*cx saving face or have an honest conversation with me in my private Facebook group f*ck saving face. That's fact without the U if you enjoy this work, please help support and sustain it. The best ways to do that are to share it with your friends and networks. Subscribe rate and review on your listening platforms. And of course through your thoughtful financial donations. You can buy me a coffee or treatment or lunch or share even bigger lab at F*cx saving face.com Again, that's f*ck without the U.
LIKE WHAT YOU HEARD?
Help us get more content like this out into the world!
Rate and review this podcast, join our newsletter, or make a donation here.
